I Can’t Do It

The past week and a half? A nightmare of ever-compounding stress. To put it mildly.

Ok. I’m being a little overdramatic… but honestly, these past weeks were some of the most stressful that I’ve ever had.

This is my senior year, so of course I don’t expect it to be a cakewalk. But you know that scene in Star Wars where the walls are starting to close in and they’re all freaking out in that nasty water?

Yeah. That was me. Except substitute the walls for the longest to do list on the planet and the nasty water for my unshowered grossness. Because we all know that in college you get to pick two of the following: homework, sleep, or hygiene. If you get enough of all three, you’re not doing it right. (And if you don’t get this Star Wars reference, let’s just pretend like it didn’t happen…)

Despite the stress and frantic running around I did this week, I am so thankful that it happened. This experience taught me an invaluable lesson: I could never do this by myself.

I tend to think I don’t need help from anyone. I am someone who thrives on praise. I  take pride in my accomplishments and independence. I want others to notice ME. But this week took a whopping humble pie and smashed it right in my arrogant face.

I realized how stupid I was being. Accepting help is not a sign of weakness, it’s a sign of maturity.

And I can’t count the number of people that offered me their support in one way or another.

• My boyfriend and his roommate took time out of their busy schedules to do voiceovers for my radio ad.
• My friend Michael dropped what he was doing late at night to help me figure out some technical issues I was having.
• My roommates didn’t badger me about the fact that I forgot I was in the middle of doing laundry a good 4 or 5 times (sorry sorry sorry!)
• My parents let me cry it out to them on speaker phone (no shame).
• My friend Becky even gave up her computer for 4 straight hours so I could finish my TV commercial on time (If that’s not love, I don’t know what is).
• Not to mention the many people who were there for me to vent to. I probably would have exploded if I hadn’t had some way to relieve my stress.

Tonight when I finally crossed the last task off my to do list, I wasn’t thinking: “Hey. Good job, Emily. Have a nice pat on the back.” I was thinking: “Thank God for all the people who helped me get to this point in one piece.”

So this blog post is a thank you to those who have been and will continue to be there for me when I need them. But more than anything, it’s a reminder (to myself and whoever else) that we don’t have to do it alone. In fact, I don’t believe we are supposed to. Humans are built for community, and we should be supportive of each other. I often get so caught up in what I’m doing that I lose sight of that.

Basically what I’m saying is that if you’re having a week where the walls are closing in and your deodorant isn’t cutting it anymore, call me up. I’ll put a clothespin on my nose and be there to lend you an ear or a shoulder or whatever you need.

I feel a song coming on….

(Is this or is this not one of the most awkward album covers on the planet. Who’s that bro creepin’ in the background?)

Anyway… I hope you have a nice, stress-free week. But if not, you know where to find me.

This scary thing called… adulthood

So this whole senior year thing. It’s exciting. But to shoot straight, I’m a little more than terrified. This is my last year as an advertising major at Winona State before I have to get my life together and become an… *gulp* adult. Pretty freaky. I have to get a real job and a real apartment and make real contacts with real professionals… andohmygoshIdon’tthinkIcandothis! Excuse me for a minute while I paper-bag it in this corner.

I tease. Although there’s a bit of hyperventilating going down, there’s also a big part of me that’s excited. I’m a little kid in a candy store. There are so many different flavors out there, and being forced to choose just one is overwhelming! I mean, there’s chocolate AND cookies n creme AND eleven million flavors of taffy!

My stomach and I just want to make sure we’re making the best possible choice!

So now that I’ve successfully made you drool (it’s Niagara falls up in here), I’m just gonna get straight to the point….. (I’m gonna be incredibly cliche here, but stay with me).

(Don’t groan, it goes with the candy theme). Although painfully cliche, Mr. Gump’s words ring true. As much as you hope your carefully laid plans and bachelor’s degree are going to make your dreams come true, you really just have to uncross your fingers, quit holding your breath, and jump.

So there you have it, folks. That’s what I’m doing here. Taking life as it comes and writing about the things I encounter on the way. So… let’s just go with it.

Oh! By the way. Nice beard you have there, Forrest. Mama would be proud.